Searching for You
by bookworm46
Summary: Tris wakes up alone and scarred in a desolate area of Arizona. Se doesn't remember much, except seemingly useless facts. Like dates... and letters. The only clue to her identity is a tattoo on her wrist. But it doesn't tell her much. A year later, she decides to take a trip to Chicago, where she was born and raised, but she doesn't know that... Divergent A/U...
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys. I know. I've deleted yet another one of my stories, ****_So Unlikely._**** That was the title and I realize now that it was kind of ironic. Sorry to all of those followers, favoriters, and reviewers. Here's my new one and, based on my past reputation, I might end up deleting this one, too. ****_Might._**

**I don't own either the Divergent rights or the rights to ****_Animals _****by Maroon 5.**

**Searching for You- Chapter 1**

You know that feeling where you jut know something is wrong? That something is just somehow…off? That's the feeling I had right then, and I hadn't even opened my eyes. But things just got worse when I _did _open them.

First, I closed them immediately to ward off the sun's harsh glare. I also tried to pull my hands up and block my eyes, but that hurt too much. I didn't know why at the time. But I powered through it all. I slowly opened my eyes and forced them to adjust to the light. I didn't move my head at all, but my eyes were moving too quickly for me to comprehend.

I saw the blue sky and white, puffy clouds. It was surreal. I honestly thought it was a dream at first, although, that couldn't have been true since I knew for a fact I had just woken up. And, by the state of my mind, I knew I had been asleep for a _long _time.

I remember I blinked a few times to get rid of the fuzziness in my eyes. I breathed in new air. That was a mistake. Once I did that, I couldn't seem to get enough. I was breathing in deep breaths and I shot up into a sitting position to avoid coughing. I didn't know how I knew to do that. Instinct, probably. And now, my hands had flown to my throat. The skin was rough under my hands while my hands seemed to be just as calloused.

So, I looked down at my arms and hands. My wrists were covered in bruises and marks. They went all the way around, like bracelets, and they were reflected down on my ankles and feet. Cuts decorated my hands and feet. I held out my hands in front of me for inspection. There was blood embedded in my nails, and skin, too. I didn't see any scratch marks on me, so I assumed I had clawed someone else.

_Oh God, _I thought as realization hit hard. I was attacked. I was sure of it.

I felt around my body, over a blue cloth shirt and white jeans. I had to make sure nothing was broken or bleeding. I _did _find that there was dried blood on my pants, staining them a pinkish red. The blood must have been old.

A sound of cracking and snapping twigs came from my right and my head whipped around. Trees surrounded me, and I was disoriented. I couldn't tell which way was which. But, I appeared to be in a clearing of a forest. I listened again for any other noise. Nothing came.

"Hello," I tried calling out. My voice cracked and squeaked. It was quiet, too. I suppose I hadn't been talking much lately. I coughed for a long time before clearing my throat. "Hello," I said again. My voice was stronger, but it was still quiet. I would have to work on it later, but whatever made that noise was gone.

I got up and realized the sun had started to go down in the west. It was weird that I knew basic facts, or even which way was west. I couldn't have explained it. I'm going to stick with it being instinct; seems more plausible.

I had to get out of there, before it was dark. Bad things happened after dark, I knew that, too. I started to head north.

...

It had been hours of walking, hiking, and trudging through the forests before I though I made any progress, but, when I did, I _knew _I did. See, I could hear cars. Like on a highway or road. So, obviously, I picked up the pace and burst through the trees. I was right; there was a road. It went straight, north and south, stretching into the distance. And what I had mistaken for cars, was one car, already too far away to flag down. I still tried, though.

"Hey!" I tried yelling. Of course, it was futile. My voice was still scratchy and I could even hear the music blasting from the stereo:

_Baby, I'm preying on you tonight_

_Hunt you down, eat you alive_

_Just like animals, animals, like animals-mals_

_Maybe you think that you can hide_

_I can smell your scent for miles_

_Just like animals, animals, like animals-mals_

_Baby, I'm-_

My eyes widened as I hear the song. I _knew_ that song. Scenes of blood and darkness flashed before me, blocking out my vision. Pain. I don't know why, but pain was associated with that song. My eyes closed to block out the visions, but they just got stronger. Sounds came back to me. I was screaming and crying, someone was laughing in the background. I opened my eyes and looked around. My vision was blurred, so I gingerly touched my eyes. They were wet; I was… crying. I don't even remember crying.

Something twisted deep in my stomach. I ran to the edge of the road and knelt down. I vomited right there and ended of with dry heaves. I suppose I hadn't eaten in a while.

I sat down and tried to piece things together. I was attacked, probably abused. It couldn't have been long since I remember that song. I didn't cry again, but instead, steeled myself for the dark and cold night.

The sun had almost completely vanished and the moon had popped up in the distance behind a few mountains. Stars were out and the sky was black as pitch. My body shivered reflexively in response to the sudden cold. But I stood up anyway. I wasn't tired, I had practically just woken up. I began walking again.

...

**_Meanwhile in Chicago…_**

Zeke tried to calm down his friend, holding him by the shoulders. Four had been a mess for the past three months since his beloved Tris had vanished. She hadn't left a note, or anything, which led the police and her friends to believe she was taken.

Four was currently throwing things around their apartment. Zeke wanted to join him. Tris _was _his cousin. They were closer than most, too, along with Uriah. But he had to stay strong for his friend. Four and Tris had been dating since sophomore year of high school. Of course it would be hard on him. But it was hard on everyone else, too. They had a group of friends Tris had grown up with. They all attended the University of Chicago together and her vanishing had destroyed most of them. She was the life of them. She was crazy and up for anything. She made college feel like _college_. She had somehow also managed to maintain a 4.0 GPA. Everyone wanted to be her. Everyone liked her and she loved her life. She wouldn't have run away, either. It was confusing, but there was nothing they could do. Except wait, that is.

**So, how was it? I liked it and I hope you did, too. I'll probably post the next chapter next week or something. This was a long opening chapter for me. I was impressed with myself. Anyway, thanks for reading. Read and Review.**

** xoxo- Viv**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi, guys. Thank you guys for giving this story a chance, especially when the summary was basically shit, but oh well. Moving on, here's the second chapter. I realize it is early, but whatever.**

**Disclaimer: I STILL don't own the rights to the Divergent series. That honor goes to the lovely Ms. Roth.**

**Searching for You- Chapter 2**

_Three Months Later…_

"That'll be seven dollars and forty cents, please," I tell the beefy man in front of the counter. He hands over the cash while saying, "You know, I can give more than a few dollars if you've got a little time." He winks as he says it.

I try not to wrinkle my nose physically, but I do throw up in my mouth a little. "Not interested. Don't you have somewhere to be?" I ask him. I get people like him all the time. Grown men that think they can take advantage of a young girl working at the convenience store in the middle of deserted Arizona. I've learned how to deal with them both nonviolently and, if necessary, with force.

"Baby, I got all the time in the world for you," he says and licks his lips. He gives me a once over with his eyes and I narrow my eyes. Under the counter, I grab the pepper spray I keep for emergencies like this.

"Sir," I start like a lady with class. "Get the fuck out of my convenience store," I finish like the badass I _actually_ am.

He grabs his pack of cigarettes off the counter with a frustrated puff of breath. He walks out of the dust covered door and into the blaring sun of the Arizona desert. I take a deep breath and let it out only when I hear a truck pull away onto the stretching road.

I hear a new song start to play on the static radio of the store.

_I wish that I could wake up with amnesia_

_And forget about the stupid, little things_

_Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you_

_And the memories I never can escape_

I scowl at the radio and turn it off. I realize it's stupid, but I get angry every time I hear that song. They didn't know what it was like to actually forget things and they'd be stupid to wish for it. I always try to imagine my life without the looming problem in it. My amnesia. It had been a little less than three months with this shitty condition blocking all of my memories. I remember running into this store on that second morning.

**_Three months ago…_**

_I had been walking for a day and a half now and it was now night again, I hadn't eaten or slept in fear of someone driving along and leaving me behind. My lips were chapped and skin had a glistening coat of sweat from head to toe. My whole body ached and I couldn't think straight. The air was cool, though, for a desert like place. And there was wind. A light, light wind, but it was still there. _

_My eyelids could barely keep open when I saw a light. It wasn't moonlight like I had expected, but instead a fluorescent white light that hurt my eyes, even from this distance. I looked up to see a store with gas pumps out in the front. I squinted to make sure it was real. _

_I unfolded my arms from my chest and started walking faster. Though that didn't last long. Soon, I started running towards the haven-like building. _

_As soon as I was through the doors, I saw a man behind the counter. Well, his blonde head anyway, but that didn't matter to me at the moment. I ran straight through the entire store until I found the ladies bathroom. The door almost blew off of its hinges at the force I swung it open with. I could hear the guy from the counter yelling at me. He didn't seem to be saying words, but just shouting. _

_I locked the door immediately behind me and ran for the mirror. I almost cried at what stared back at me. _

_A massive mess of black hair with a purple streak was on top of my head. I had blue eyes that were bulging out of my head at the moment. My face was pale and free of freckles or blemishes. My lips were pink, but then again, they were also chapped. I brought my shaking hands up to the sink and rinsed them in the cool water. I also threw my head under the faucet and soaked my hair. _

_I could hear the guy shouting at me, but I continued to ignore him. He was of minor importance for now. I took off my shirt and threw it into the second sink along with the rest of my clothes. I washed my face and rinsed the sand off of my body. From there, I heard the man outside shout something. _

_"I'll call the police if you don't come out right now!" he yelled. I don't know why, but that stimulated me. I whipped my head around and blinked. "No!" I said back. I couldn't yell, but if I could have, my voice would have cracked. "Don't! I'll be right out."_

_I threw on my wet clothes and squeezed out my dripping hair. I slowly made my way to the door and unlocked it. I opened too quickly for him to notice, too, because he tried to beat on it again, but almost hit me in the face. _

_I grabbed his fist on reflex. My eyes widened and I quickly dropped his hand. He looked at me, narrowing his eyes. "What'd you steal? Where is it?" he asked me. _

_I looked at him incredulously, expecting him to soften or something at the sight of me. Nothing all he did was continue to stare at me with his celery green eyes. _

_"Do I _look _like I could hide anything on me?" I asked him and gestured to my body. He looked at me and stood up straighter. He was taller than me, but I seemed to be short in the mirror so I wasn't surprised. His blonde hair swayed as he pushed it to the side. He gave me a half-smile and offered his hand. "I'm Will," he said. _

**_Now…_**

From there, he asked me my name, which I said nothing. He continued to inquire about me, to which I said nothing still. It wasn't until he threatened with the police again that I used my voice.

"Don't you fucking dare," I said in a voice I thought was hostile. "Or I'll kick your ass." He only smiled at that and he said, "Well, that was cute. I like you."

I then realized he wasn't _really _going to call the police. He explained that his father owned the store at one point until he decided to take a surprise vacation and leave to Florida. _I don't mind, _he said_. He was a drunkard anyway. _

His father hadn't returned so far, which Will saw as an improvement from when he was here. So he was alone. I remember finding that a bi odd, since, well, who would want to be alone by choice? I don't know where that piece of wisdom came from, but it seemed to apply in the situation.

Then, he tried to ask me things. Like where was I from and how old was I and, oh God, what was my name. That was the worst since I didn't have any clue to the answer.

The others, I at least had an idea. Like the numbers popping into my head when he asked how old I was. Two, twelve. I suppose it could have been February twelfth, or December second. I felt more of a winter girl, so I went with the December date. I still had to ask him what year it was and how old I looked. So, I turned around with him following me. He bumped into me and his body was hard against my soft one. I could see him blush and I tried not to smile. It would be so easy to mess with him. Not yet, though. He said I looked twenty, so I said I was nineteen. He was also nineteen. And, luckily, I found a calendar by the door. It was August fourteenth, year 2014 at the time. Now, it's November and close to my birthday.

He ended up giving me a job there after some hardcore negotiating. He needed someone anyway, too. No police would be involved. I wouldn't tell local authorities about his father leaving him alone and he wouldn't tell them about the mysterious girl that seemed to be incredibly stupid.

I laugh at the memory. He still doesn't know I've lost my memory. _The idiot, _I think.

"Who's an idiot?" The bell jingle and Will walks in with two bottles of soda pops. He throws me one and I catch it with my still spot-on reflexes. I never figured that one out.

"What?" I ask, caught off guard by him. He was early; he was supposed to be in Phoenix for a few more hours at least, getting the restocking supplies for the store. And it wouldn't have taken long, but this was a small store and gas station in the middle of nowhere, Arizona. Even Phoenix was more than forty miles away.

"No one's an idiot. I don't know what you're talking about," I finish not so smoothly and take a long sip of my drink. It's lukewarm, but that's all it'll ever be here in Arizona. He looks at me sideways and opens his mouth to say something. "Why are you early?" I ask to silence him. I don't think he'll ever fully trust me. But, then again, I wouldn't trust me.

"I'm early because that son of a bitch Michael called halfway from Phoenix and said the supplies would be late coming in. Apparently, they're coming from Chicago and …" His voice trails off and I hear my bottle distantly shatter in the background, but I don't care at the moment. I hear Will set his drink down and shout at me, but then his voice becomes one of concern.

My head is filled with images. Images of a building, a giant old looking building. And a symbol; one of an open book and an eagle facing left. I can hear laughter echoing through my mind and I can see a guy chasing a girl through open halls of the building. A girl with long blonde hair bursts through the large wooden doors and into the snow falling down. The boy finds her in the snow and picks her up and spins her around in his arms. The laugh and giggle as he kisses her nose tenderly. I car horn honks and they look away from each other and towards the roads.

The vision ends and I see Will hovering over me. My eyes are blurred and I blink repetitively to clear them. His brow is creased in concern and his hands are on my face, looking into my eyes. "Can you hear me? Are you there, Heaven?" he asks me. At the nickname he gave me, I come back to life fully and completely. I remember why he started calling me that. Well, it's because I didn't tell him my name, but also because of the tattoo on my right wrist. In cursive, it says, _Through Heaven. _He calls me Heaven now. I push him away gently and nod.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," I say and look around at the glass on the ground. He backs off, but eyes me suspiciously.

"Really, are you fine? Because you just fucking fell over and fainted. You're not fine, Heaven," he argues, but I wave him off.

"No, no, I am, really," I say and stand up. I don't even sway which convinces me of the truth I'm telling. "What were you saying? Earlier? Before this whole…?" I ask and gesture to the floors where I begin to clean the glass and soda pop.

"What are you even talking about? That doesn't matter!" he says and forces me to look at him. "Are you alright? Did something happen?" he asks and I shake my head. He's onto me, though. He knows the only other time I was this disoriented was three months ago, when I lost my memory. But he doesn't know I had lost my memory. To him, I'm just some mysterious girl who probably ran away from home.

"Look, Will," I stop cleaning and take his hands away from my shoulders. "This is important. Really. What were you saying earlier?"

He shakes his head at the ground and looks at me. "I don't know. The shipments from Chicago and the supplies," he says and scratches the back of his neck.

I shake my head and stare him in the eyes. "No, I don't think you understand. Something happened, Will. I saw something when I was out. There were people, and they were happy. There was snow and this giant building. Will," I say and my voice cracks at this point. I try not to look at him because of the wetness in my eyes. "Will," I try again and succeed. "I don't know if you've figured it out or not, but three months ago, when I ran in here for the first time, I was fucking scared. Know why? Because I was lost. I didn't know where I was, what year it was or even my name. I didn't remember anything or anyone and I was strong. But this is enough; I need to know what happened to me. What I just saw, those were memories, I'm sure of it. Those were the first memories I've had for three months since I woke up. Will, you have to trust me. _I need to know._" I finish in tears and I'm sure my face is pale.

I finally find the courage to look up at him. He opens his arms and grabs my face.

"Come here, Heaven," he says and hugs me tight. "I though you were disoriented, but I didn't know you were lost." His hand is on the back of my head and he strokes my hair. It was black still, but the purple streak from months ago had just been an extension. "We'll get through this, okay? We'll find out what happened to you, I promise. Especially if it means leaving this dump." He laughs a little chuckle and I smile in his arms.

**Alright, let me get one thing clear: There is nothing sexual going on between Will and "Heaven." Their relationship is purely that of siblings. They are not even dating or remotely interested in each other. Okay, now that's out of the way. **

**I am really proud of this specific chapter. I've gotten better at writing, and don't argue with me because you've never read anything of mine before. Also, I don't proofread my writing. I know I really should, but when I finish a chapter, I get really eager to post it. A little too eager, I guess. Anyway, thank you to those four that reviewed, you guys make me smile, kinda like chocolate. Chocolate makes me smile, too. Therefore, you guys are chocolate. Read and review, my little chocolates. ;) - - - Viv**

**(Also, I don't own Amnesia by 5 Seconds of Summer. And, I love them so much. Really. Ashton is my favorite.)**


	3. Chapter 3

**OH. MY. GOD. I haven't updated in forever. I am seriously sorry for that. I suppose I didn't because of my school or the holidays, but I'm not looking for excuses. I don't think you want my excuses, so I'll give you a long third chapter instead. How 'bout it? Okay…. Sorry…. again….**

**Searching for You – Chapter 3**

I lie in bed next to Will. He is asleep, but I can't seem to close my eyes. I look over at him sleeping peacefully. He would sometimes smile in his sleep, but tonight he is emotionless.

I enjoy sleeping next to him. We were just friends and obviously there is nothing sexual between us. At first, he made me sleep in the bed and he would sleep on the floor, then we started taking turns, then gradually, we agreed we could sleep together without any awkwardness. This has been going on for a few weeks now. He has a small house a few miles away and an even smaller apartment in the city in case he needed to stay for a night or two. I has never asked him about it since I didn't need to. I haven't left the store or house for the three months I've been here, but I don't want to anyway. He would make all the trips and I would work while he was gone.

It seems unrealistic, really, like no one would even go through here. But they do, families on road trips to Texas or California. People driving to get away. We get a few runaways who end up asking for a phone to call the police or their parents. They're my favorite.

Will moves in his sleep and calls out for someone. A girl named Cara. This isn't the first time, though, so I don't wake him up. The first time, I was really scared, so I asked him who she was. He waved me off and said to ignore it. The next few times, I listened for anything else, but it's always just her name. _Maybe it was family_, I thought. But then I pushed the thought away since it made me wonder if I have family or if they were all gone. It could have been his girlfriend, but that was unlikely since he seemed to never have left this godforsaken state.

He called out again to which I turned over and tried closing my eyes to sleep.

... . ... .. . ... . .. . ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... . ... . .. ... . . ... ... .. ...

"Hey, hey," I hear something say. "Listen to me. This is important," it says. It's a high pitch voice, that of a girl's, a young girl. Like a child.

I open my eyes and almost scream. There is in fact a little girl in front of me, staring with large blue eyes. She has shiny blonde hair in waves over her shoulders. I look around and see I'm laying in a white fluffy powder and it's cold. It's…snow. I smile. I don't ever remember snow, although I only remember the past few months in Arizona, of course there wasn't snow. And the snow is still falling around me lightly.

"Hey," she says again. And I turn to look at her. She's only eight or maybe nine.

"I don't care," I say lightly, carefree. "This is a dream, little girl," I say and smile at the snow. This isn't real and it'll be over soon.

"No," she says, her voice becoming more urgent with each word. "You're name isn't Heaven, silly." I freeze, figuratively of course, not due to the snow.

"What?" I ask the girl and drop my hands from the air; the snow falls off of them and lands around my feet. "What did you say? Do you know my name?" I turn and face her and start to walk towards her. She jumps up and smiles at me. "Of course I know your name!" she laughs at me like she knows something I don't. "I am you. And you name is-" she breaks off and I feel something drop in my stomach.

"What?" I ask her. Why did she stop talking like that, why would she stop when this is so important?

Her face goes blank and she raises her hands to my face. "You need to figure that out on your own, but this might help," she whispers and raises her open hand to show me a number. "Good luck."

... ... . . ... . ... ... ... ... ... ... ... . ... ... . ... .. ... ... . . . .

I open my eyes at the sun shining through the shades. They barely do anything to stop the light. But, it's a good alarm clock. I can hear a shower going on down the hall and realize it's time to start the day.

I look around the room and find the clock. It's six o'clock. I throw my legs over the edge of the bed and cover my face with my hands. Nothing would get better by sitting in the house or the store.

I get up and look into the mirror determinedly. I turn around and take a quick shower in the second shower. I apply small makeup and get dressed quickly. After that is all out of the way, I walk downstairs where I find Will stirring sugar into his coffee, still half asleep. "Will," I say directly. He jumps at the sound of my voice and knocks the entire jar of sugar into the mug. We both stare at it for a few seconds before he sighs and looks at me. "It's too early for this," he says and gestures to the sugar. I smile before remembering my mission.

"Will, I think," I start slowly and unsurely. I twist my hands together. I don't know how to say this. "Um." I didn't plan how I would say this.

"What?" he says and begins to clean the mess. "You think?"

"I think we should take a road trip," I blurt out and look anywhere but in his direction. "You know. Get out of here for a few weeks anyway. It's November, maybe we could go see snow somewhere. We could spend my birthday or maybe Christmas somewhere," I keep talking so he can't interrupt me and say no. "You need to get out of here. You could hire someone to run the store while we're gone. Or you could just lock up."

I look away and bring a mug down from the cupboard to make coffee. I can practically hear the gears turning in his head. But, I can't imagine what he's thinking. "Yeah," he agrees and I hear him dump the spoiled sugar in the trash. "We could go somewhere. My dad left a couple thousand bucks in his bank account in Phoenix; maybe we could pull that out. I was saving it for emergencies, but we could do that."

My mood lifts and I smile wholeheartedly. I don't want him to spend his money on me, but I can feel like this means something to him, too.

"Where do you think we should go?" he asks me, making a new cup of coffee. I shrug. I honestly don't know where we should go, but something the girl showed me last night is stuck in my head. The number. Four. 4. I don't know what it meant, and it didn't cause me any visions, but I suppose it was important because my subconscious decided to show me it. I don't remember mush else from the dream. I decide to ask Will about the images. "I don't know. I'll figure it out later. But, for now, I have to ask you something."

He raises one of his eyebrows in question. I bite my lip.

"Okay, so, you're smart. And I saw something yesterday when I fainted." I pause and look at him. He stares back, but now has more of an interested look in his eye. "Well, okay. It was like an emblem. Like the shape of a coat of arms, but it had an eagle below an open book. I don't know; it was confusing. I can't really remember much more than that. Forget I asked." This was a bad idea. This was a very bad idea. I don't know why I thought he would know what it meant. It could be anything, really.

He stares at me without blinking, like he didn't believe me.

"What?" I ask. He continues to stare. "Will, you're scaring me. Stop it." He seems to snap out of it at that point.

"What? Sorry. Nothing," he says and smiles at me. "How about Chicago?"

What? "What are you talking about?" I ask him.

"I mean, let's go to Chicago for the rest of the year. Just until you're tired of searching or you've found something. What do you say?" He shrugs. "And, well, even if you don't find anything, we'll still be in Chicago for the holidays."

I nod. That's not a bad idea, actually. I agree we should go to Chicago.

"Great we'll leave next week. And we're taking your car," I say and walk out the door with a wink.

... ... ... ... ... ... ... . ... . ... . . ... . ... . . . ... .. ... . .. ... . ... . ... . **(This is not Morse Code. Just a page break.)**

"Alright," I say, trying to catch my breath. This is exciting and I can't contain myself. I'm leaving this desolate Arizona desert. I can tell Will is also thrilled, but he has a hesitant sort of look in his eyes.

"Will, the store is not going to disappear. Now, get your ass in this car and let's get this show on the road," I say and look him dead in the eye. He purses his lips before locking the store's front doors. I think I hear him whisper a goodbye to it. I barely resist the urge to roll my eyes. He hops in the car and looks at me, then at the windshield, then at me again. This time, I do in fact roll my eyes.

"What?" I ask him. He stares at me for a solid minute before looking forward again, starting the ignition and pulling out onto the main road through the desert, heading north.

"Nothing," he says a few minutes later. "It's just, aren't you a little… um… well, nervous?" I think about the question before answering. I mean, sure, I'm nervous, but I'm more anxious than anything. If nothing happens, oh well, I tried. I might eventually go to the police if I'm desperate enough. But if something _did _happen…

"Of course I'm nervous, Will," I assured him. "But, I'm excited, too. And you should be, also. Maybe, I'll find who I am." I pause for a few seconds before smirking.

"And maybe you'll find someone better than your precious gas station. Like, a girl."

He shakes his head as I laugh and look at the rearview mirror at the sand billowing behind the truck.

"I'm not like that," he says after my laughter dies down. "I won't be looking for a girlfriend. I'm going to enjoy myself and help you out. Remember?" I stop laughing completely and look at him. "Okay, right. But, if nothing happens, we'll still be in Chicago. We can visit the pier, Millennium Park…"

**Four Days Later**

I roll down the window to let some of the fresh air in, then immediately roll it up. Damn, it's cold outside. Dark, too. I furrow my brow and look at the dashboard clock.

_9:00 pm. _Figures. Will and I have been switching turns with the driving. The hundreds of miles have really worn us down.

I look over at Will, sleeping with his hands in his lap and his head against the window. I decide to wake him up. I look back at the road and smirk before finding and rock radio station. I smirk even wider when I hear_ Livin' On A Prayer _by Bon Jovi.

I look at Will one last time, one hand on the wheel, the other on the radio dial, ready to turn it up. I hesitate only for a second before cranking up the song, way past what it should be. He jerks awake, his hands flying up and smacking himself in the face. I sputter a laugh. He looks at me bleay-eyed, kind of lost looking. I turn the music down and look back to the road.

"Sorry," I say. "Not sorry." I laugh and continue. "I just though I should wake you since we'll be in Chicago in a few minutes." I point through the windshield ahead. The outline of the city with it's lights all on was visible. "We're almost there."

... . . . . ... . ... . ... . ... . . ... ... . .. ... ... ... . ... ... . ... ... . .

**Today… But in Chicago**

Six months. It had been six months since Tris' disappearance. And every day has been unbearable. Four had barely slept and when he did he cried himself to sleep. Now the sheets have almost entirely lost her scent, but the perfume in the bathroom was still there. He didn't want to spray it, but sometimes he did; he needed her home again.

He had managed to go back to classes at the university, as had everyone else. They continued, although none of them wanted to. What was life without their beloved Tris? It was nothing. Nothing at all.

The investigation had slowed and she'd been added to the national missing persons list. Zeke and Uriah had called their family and informed them, but they were on vacation in London and couldn't make it back yet. Her family was unresponsive, probably still high. Regardless, they wouldn't have cared.

Four just wished there was a body to be found. It was better she be dead than kidnapped, abused, or raped. He couldn't afford to think like that, though.

He sighed silently in the empty apartment. It wasn't actually empty, it was just missing something too important. Tris.

He needed to graduate already. This May. Tris was graduating this December first, the day before her birthday. She was so excited, bursting with energy, really. He just wished she could have made it until then.

**This got really depressing, really fast. Sorry. I promise, when Tris said, "We're almost there," I meant it. They will reunite soon. Hey, really and truly sorry about the whole "I'm a couple months late" thing. *scratches back of neck embarassedly* I hope you'll forgive me and still read it. Okay Read and Review. Please. Sorry.**

**Viv**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi. Or, Hey. *Giggle giggle* Anyway, so that last chapter I used that whole Writer's License, but I'll be doing that for this whole story. Also, guess what? I'm back on schedule. Yep. I hope I won't be late anymore. No, I probably will be. I seriously hope not… Here you go. Also, I'm switching from kind of past-present tense to actual past tense. Enjoy my small chocolates. **

**Searching for You – Chapter 4**

"So, this apartment is only twelve hundred a month. Now, you'll pay two months up front and continue from there at twelve each month," the relator said to us. Rather nervously, too. She looks around the apartment once more.

Will and I had been searching for an apartment for three days while living in his truck. Everything has been too expensive and this one is the cheapest one yet, even though it seems like it was falling apart. But it was large. That was a plus. It had three bedrooms, a kitchen and a small entryway by the door and the first hallway that could double as a living space. A mirror hung on the wall by the door with a lamp on each side. The kitchen was exceptional compared to the rest of the apartment. It had a fridge that I suppose would keep food cool, but not cold. The counters, which were black and bare, had a few scratches on them. The cupboards were a kind of maroon and squeaked on the hinges. They worked though.

Will looks around at the place with a look of disdain clear on his face. Apparently, nothing could compete with his beloved convenience store.

"Well, it's a little expensive," he said. He rubbed his chin in a thoughtful manner that seems extremely exaggerated to me. My eyes widen at his statement. That was the best offer we'd had so far. I opened my mouth to say something, but with one look from Will, I was silent.

The relator whirled around and widened her eyes. "No," she said and threw up her hands. "Um, well, I mean." She stuttered and frantically looked around the three-room apartment. Her hands stilled and she looked at Will.

"Well, you're a couple, right?" she assumed, motioning to him and me. He looked at me and grabbed my waist, pulling me close to his side. I got the memo and rested my head on his shoulder, well tried to; he was almost too tall.

"Of course. Have been for three years," I said and smiled genuinely. Well, it was real enough, because the relator bought it.

"Yes, um, we have a special deal for couples getting their, um, first apartment. So, if you're interested, it's only one thousand for the first six months, that is," she finished and held her clipboard to her chest tightly. She looked subtly to the side while Will cleared his throat. He made a big show about weighing the options in his head.

"Yeah, yeah. Well, I suppose that would suffice. What do you think, babe?" he said. It caught me off guard and I snapped to attention at the last word.

"Hmmm, yes, yes," I said and looked left and straight at the relator. "We'll take it. Babe, you get the check book and I'll look into this deal a little more."

"Great," he said and held his hand out to shake his hand with her.

… …. . . …. . .. … …. … …. . . … . .. .. . … … …. .. . …. . . … … ….. . …. . … … .. .. . .

"Ugh," I say and plopped down on the mattress on the ground. There was no bed, just the sheets on the mattress. That was fine. Anything was better than that damn truck. Will was down there now getting the last of our duffel bags out of the trunk of the truck. They had sealed the deal the woman an hour ago, but something was sketchy about the whole thing. I mean, obviously, the couple's deal thing was fake, so Will and I were fake in return. But, I couldn't figure out why she was so eager to get the place off of her hands. It made me reluctant, but hat else could we do?

Will and I had decided to stay for the six months that the deal would last and then make our way out of here by June. Unless we otherwise change our minds.

I closed my eyes tight and tried again to remember anything from my non existent memory. Nothing. Not a single fucking thing. "Ugh! Fuck!" I yell. I open my eyes and throw a pillow at the wall. I jerk up when I hear Will's exclamation of surprise. He caught the pillow with one hand while he dropped the rest of the luggage onto the floor. He makes a _tsk, tsk _sound with his mouth and throws the pillow gently back before picking up the bags and moving them to the other side of the room.

"Language, Heaven. There might be children around," he warns jokingly and I roll my eyes before turning over, facedown on the mattress.

"I swear, Will," I start. "I saw an old woman with four cats on a leash next to us, two teens totally about to get it on in the apartment above us, and _smelled _this junkie smoking crack two doors over."

He chuckled and looked at me. "Are you regretting getting this apartment?" he asked. He raised an eyebrow, but he knew what my answer would be.

"Absolutely not. I'm just saying, I think that's why she was so eager to get rid of the place. Not the area, but more like the people. Besides, they'll make interesting neighbors." I cracked a smile and we simultaneously burst out laughing. He walked over to me and lay down next to me. "I'm gonna go take a shower. You probably need one, too," he said and nudged me. "But I'm not gonna just give you all the hot water." He got up again after a few minutes of silence.  
>"Tomorrow, Heaven, we'll have to get jobs. Anything will be fine, but whenever and wherever they'll hire you, take the job. Immediately."<p>

I nod into the mattress, too tired to get up or speak. I hear him sigh tiredly and I can imagine him running his hand over his tired, unshaven face. The door to the bathroom finally opens, closes, and locks.

I wait for the shower to turn on before turning over and grabbing a change of clothes and stripping into my almost naked self. I get up and walk to the mirror in the hallway. I liked the way I looked. My body was healing from the abuse it had taken months previously. The scratches on my arms and thighs had healed and some had faded, but they made it look like I had cut myself. Maybe I did, before my memory was lost, in my life prior to all of this. I sighed and rubbed at my arms.

The ink on my right wrist caught my eye. I turned it and smiled. The tattoo read _Through Heaven._ I didn't know what it meant or stood for. I was glad I had it, though. It meant I was something before. I had a life and friends and maybe family.

The water turned off and I quickly changed into my tanktop and shorts. I took my hair out of its ponytail and let it fall over my shoulders. The black strands were limp and dry. They needed washing and shampoo, probably some conditioner, too. I had travel sized bottles in my bag from the hotels. I'd probably use all of them in the morning and buy some more tomorrow when I went out to get a job.

"Heaven," I heard Will yell and looked away from the mirror. I walked in the direction of his voice and smiled when I saw him on his phone scrolling through his texts from someone. Probably someone from Phoenix. He seemed pissed off at the phone.

"What's up?" I asked and crawled under the thin sheet with him. "Who is it?"

He rolled his eyes and locked his phone before setting on the floor next to him. "No one. Just the assholes from Arizona wondering where I am. You know, frankly, I'm upset it took them a week to realize I was missing. Like, am I really that insignificant to them?" he asks. He doesn't seem hurt and the question, I realize, is rhetorical. I nudge him in the ribs.

"Oh, you're not insignificant to anyone. _Babe._" I exaggerate the last word giggle as he rolls his eyes and grumbles. He turns over and mumbles something incoherent. I smile and roll the face the other way.

I put my hands in front of me and fall asleep staring at the tattoo. _Through Heaven…_

… .. …. …. ….. … . … . … . … . . ….. . … . ….. …. . …. . … . … . … . … . . . . . …. …. .

I wake up to the morning sunlight blazing through the windows on the side of the east side of the apartment. I shield my eyes and roll over. It's not until I hear Will groan that I realize I had rolled over on top on him. I stare at him funnily and wait until his eyes open.

The celery green orbs stare back at me. They're the same green that I saw three months ago in the middle of a swearing match when I first met him.

He stares back at me until I burst out laughing and he asks me if I'm gonna get off.

I stop laughing and look him dead in the eye. "Make me," I say in a mock challenging tone. With one hand, he pushes me off of him and back onto the mattress.

I scoff. "Asshole," I say and glare at him jokingly. I get up off the mattress and shake out my hair. I grab my clothes and tell him I'm taking a shower. He nods before getting up and heading for the kitchen.

"There isn't any food, moron!" I yell and hear him sigh in a defeated tone. I chuckle and hop into the shower.

Five minutes later, after the water had gotten as cold as the weather outside, I got out and dried off. I had my hair up in a smooth bun and changed into a nice white top and black skinny jeans we had gotten the day before. I apply a few swipes of cheap drugstore mascara on my eyelashes and brush my teeth. I put on a heavy amount of chapstick and smiled in the tiny bathroom mirror. I look trustworthy, attractive. Able to hold a job. I hoped Will could clean up enough to say the same.

I took a few deep breaths before walking out into the main room, and not finding Will, walking into the kitchen. There, Will stood with two cups of Starbucks coffee and eating some kind of pastry. He looked up at me and handed me one. I took it and looked him up and down. He had on dark black jeans and a white button up, with the sleeves rolled up.

"We match," I said as he said, "We look hot." At the same time. We made eye contact and he laughed as I smiled a wide smile. We _did _in fact match, and we did look hot.

"We're funny," I said. He nodded in agreement and asked, "Yes, I wonder why we're not comedians."

"The world may never know," I say and shake my head in mock disappointment. "Anyway, I was wondering if you could drop me off downtown so I could look for a job. You could always cruise around until you find something worth your time." He nodded and brushed any existing crumbs off of the counter into the trash bin.

"Right, I'll just need to go shave first. Probably freshen up, too. Need to look good to get a job."

I pout a little. "Yes, the world is so hard on you. Go pretty yourself up, why don't you? You look homeless." He chuckles before advancing on me.

"Hey, you got a little something on you shirt there. Here, let me get it," he said and reached out for my abdomen. I looked down at where he was pointing.

"What? Where?" I ask and I realize he has sugar on his fingers. He wants to get me dirty. When I realize it, I shriek. "Ahhhhhh! You son of a bitch!" I yell and run around the apartment. "Get away from me, you twat!" I run for my small wallet and grab his keys. I turn around and say, "Okay," I pause to catch my breath. "Wait. I don't want to be sweaty at a job interview. And I _definitely_ don't want sugar on my top."

He doesn't answer and I listen closer. I hear the running of water and I realize he had gone to wash up and hadn't chased me all the way like I'd thought.

I sigh and look around. I slip on my sunglasses and debate whether or not to cover up the tattoo. I finally decide against it. "I'll be waiting in the truck!" I yell and take the keys. He yells something back and I shut the door behind me.

I mumble some not so nice things and turn to the stairwell. We were on the third floor of four floors. It was a big building. Above me, I hear the closing of the door to one of the other apartments. It was quiet, not a slam, and not a regular closing, more like they didn't want to be caught sneaking in or out.

I listen more and I hear someone making their way down towards the ground level. I collect myself and prepare for whoever's coming down, in case they decide to speak to me. I clear my throat and turn to see and girl walking down the stairs. She's wearing smeared red lipstick, which is bright and goes well with her dark skin. A wallet is dangling from her left wrist and she's holding red stilettos in her right hand. So, she's bare foot and wears some kind of cocktail dress, probably from the night before. She quietly walks down the stairs while looking up every few seconds to check if someone is following her. She seems to have not noticed me. After she's another flight of stairs below, she starts walking quicker. Like, she's clear. I hear the entrance doors swing open and close. Only then, do I notice something had slipped from her wallet. A student I.D. from the University of Chicago. It shows her picture while her name sticks out in my mind like bold letters. _Christina Wells. Class of 2015. _The name. It's so familiar. So damn familiar and it's on the tip of my tongue. I shake out of it when I hear our door open behind me. Will walks out and locks the door behind him. He gives me a weird look before motioning for me to go ahead of him.  
>"I thought you were in the car," he said from behind me and I blink to clear my head.<p>

"What? Yeah, yeah, right. I got distracted," I said, preoccupied. Millions of thoughts are running through my head. Did I know her personally? Was she famous and I just knew her like that? We walk out of the building to the truck.

"You got distracted?" Will asks, questioningly. He opens the passenger side door for me and I jump in clumsily. "On the stairwell?" I just look at him, while he shuts the door and makes his way to the driver side.

"You have no idea," I whisper, to myself more than anyone.

**Okay, so I don't really like how I ended it, but I was getting late again. Anyway, yes, that was Christina. Actual Christina. I couldn't tell if that was unclear. Also, the next chapter will be better. I really, really hope so. Remember, I don't proofread my work. I should, I really should. But I get too eager to post, so I can't. Thanks for all the reviews and favorites, and follows. My little chocolates love me! Yay! Read and Review. Viv.**


End file.
